I know you.

I know you.
All about you.
I know you are in pain,
I know you're as miserable as me.
You talk a whole lot of shit on the internet,
Hidden behind your smiley faces and innuendos,
Pretending you don't feel what I know you do.
I know the reason you write all these things,
You know I can't survive without you,
You know I will see them,
You know they hurt.
You're fucked up.
I know you.

I know you,
Everything about you,
I know your every thought,
I have kissed your every dimple,
I've witnessed your every imperfection.
When will you learn, silly little girl?
It has been far, far too long.
You can't fool me.
I know you.

I know you.
When you wake up,
I'm the first thought on your mind.
I know when you are trying to fall asleep,
you can't because you're thinking about me, us.
I know you're sleeping with the blanket I gave you.
I know that you check your phone really often, hoping to see
something from me even though you know you're not gonna respond.
I know you want things to be better and everything to go back,
but your pride is in the way and you have to save face.
I know you simply can't function right without me.
You know how to make everything better.
All you have to do is call me, and talk.
I know you because I know me,
I know you love me because

I LOVE YOU

LOVE

stare at this photograph. if necessary, google the photographer to find a version with more pixels. then stare at this picture for awhile.
look how much love is in each fiber of their being.
their torsos in contact from breast to pelvis. their arms grasping each other, so as to never ever let go.
the one on the right does seem a little more into it: her shoulders shrugging because the others' lips are raising every hair lining her spine.
the left shows her feelings on her brow. she appears to be awed by the experience. "this beautiful woman has so much passion for me." her arm cradling the right, making sure she's always close.
examine the contact point. their lips touching ever so softly, yet with so much force. the right lightly biting the left's bottom lip. the left's head tilted ever so slightly from the sensation of that tender nibbling.
their eyes closed, basking in each others' auras: knowing that in each others' hearts the only place they want to be, is right where they are.

that's love. no matter how long it lasts, no matter how short. that feeling. that body language.

that kiss.

it's love. (at least in my opinion)

btw, this poster is hanging in my room,
if only to remind me what i'm looking for.

I feel pretty, and witty, and brightt!!!!

everyone complains about how they have girl problems. "this bitch did this...", "this bitch did that..." they say men and women can't understand each other

(i don't know who they is, probably completely unreliable, so maybe this entire post is null and void, but let's explore)

dudes rarely fight with each other. girls fight with each other all the time. all those emotions and hormones and backstabbing (ala Mean Girls LOL)

anyway, the topic came up in casual conversation: do people in homosexual relationships have as many problems as people in heterosexual ones? i have no idea. i'm not into dudes. i'll do some research.

Food for thought: gay means happy

WOW

Whatcha Say
Whiskey Lullaby
Three Cheers for Five Years
If I Were a Boy
Miserable at Best
I can Feel a Hot One
Dont Forget
Bittersweet Poetry
Everything we Had
My Life Would Suck Without You
Hallelujiah

it keeps you sane

drunken rantings

so if i make any grammatcal errors in this post, don't throw a fit. not that anyone reads this stupid shit. i mean, who am i to think i'm important enough fgor other people to care about how i feel?

well i'm drunk, so i';ma go play some videogames and not bother you with retarded misery.

i'm sorry

i love you

goodnight

The Truth

In a twist of ironic fate, last night i was tasked with being the main bouncer at our future parties. They said it was because of my ability to be brutally honest and a huge asshole. They're right. i'm talented. it was a big joke. funny funny. ha. ha. Someone said i should be nicknamed "The Truth," on par with THE SITUATION from the show Jersey Shore.

catch phrase: "the truth hurts *PUNCH*" ha. haha. hahaha.

the truth does hurt. the truth is unkind and cruel. why is everyone so obsessed with telling the truth? all it creates is scandal and the loss of valuable relationships.

or perhaps we could go another direction with this line of thinking. perhaps people should just accept the truth and not think it wrong. mental reconditioning? e.g. the president getting a blowjob from his intern. what's the big deal? he runs the country, he should get blowjobs whenever he wants! why is that so fundamentally wrong? because the Church said so? fuck that shit. Religion was built on lies, too.

regardless, judging from my analysis of the world around me, it seems the best situations are ones borne of and perpetuated with lies.

everyone is happy with a lie, as long as they don't know the truth...

She said everything would be fine if I told her the truth. Everything isn't fine. Damn the truth.

Hmmm... Watcha Say?

I was so wrong for so long
Only tryna please myself
Girl, I was caught up in her lust
When I don't really want no one else
I know I should've treated you better
But me and you were meant to last forever

So let me in give me another chance
To really be your man
Cause when the roof caved in and the truth came out
I just didn't know what to do
But when I become a star we'll be living so large
I'll do anything for you

New Life

The idea never occurred to me. A life without her. It just doesn't seem real, but I guess when you're a selfish lowlife like myself, you never get what you want. I love her, but I fucked up. Can't really blame her. She's perfect. Despite all my flaws and problems. Despite my negligence and distance, she lovED me. where else was i supposed to get something like that? That kind of attachment? That kind of trust? She trusted me. I didn't care. My selfish ways can't comprehend others' needs. What am i supposed to do? I'm drowning without her. I can't fix anything from 3000 miles away, not to say that it can be fixed. Can a totalled car be repaired? yes, but at what cost?

Definition: totalled car - the car is so badly damaged that the cost to repair the vehicle is greater than the cost of the vehicle itself

I'm willing to pay the price, perhaps time in this case, is she?

So this post is called New Life. What life? I'm sitting in my dorm room getting my ass kicked at Modern Warfare 2, playing some depressing ass break up music, and zoning off to think about her whenever my fingers stop moving for 2 seconds. Some life. Time to do what every depressed, misunderstood person does: find the bottom of several bottles of various hard liqours. Shit.

Whiskey Lullaby. Good song. La la lalalala la. "I'll love her til I die" Shit that's a depressing line.

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Now playing: Brad Paisley - Whiskey Lullaby Feat. Alison Krauss
via FoxyTunes